Tuesday, August 28, 2012

the feeling of being on your own island, disconnected from the world? yeah, that was about two weeks ago. turns out i was having a pretty fucked up side effect from some allergy medicine. turns out i'm allergic to dogs, cats and carpet. i might even be having a strong reaction to the stress of buying a house and planning a wedding. even though these are the most amazing steps to be taking and i'm totally excited about all of it, the fucking stress is totally crashing in on me. i want all of this. a lovely home, a wonderful wedding, but the pulling and pushing in every direction is mind numbing. i don't even know why i get pissy bitchy anymore. i just do. the ever changing guest list, that i have renamed the head count from hell. the fact that i can't have things always go the way i'd like them too. people who you are putting a lot of responsibility on not responding. and all the tasks that need to be done, i don't mind doing them, i actually want the control but i can't control all of it. i want everyone to just peak inside my head and know what to do. i hate stress. i really do. please universe, just make everyone do their jobs in a timely fashion so i don't implode. please and thank you.

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